"Baeromez" (Baeromez)
08/10/2015 at 22:53 • Filed to: None
20
31|
"Baeromez" (Baeromez)
08/10/2015 at 22:53 • Filed to: None | 20
| 31 |
From the moment man first strapped an engine to a !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! , people have been !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .
In the past, many morons were saved from embarrassment and ridicule by the difficulty of mass communication. Thankfully, ever since the inception of the world wide web, these idiots have taken to displaying their mechanical ineptitude and lack of common sense publicly for the entertainment of all. Chronicled here are some of the most egregious examples of automotive stupidity to have ever hit the internet.
Direct Exhaust Injection
Originally posted to the GM Modern Muscle Forums, but long since removed or deleted. !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! .
Originally Posted by
The Nemesis_ZR2
First off, Jay, stay out of this.
Ok. I didn’t want to mention it but I was thinking about turbo charging my Vette. I got to thinking about it and how in efficient even turbos are (compressor efficiencies of about 80% at best).
Since a turbo’s function is to pressurize incoming air and force it into the upper motor, and turbos are driven by high pressure exhaust gas created from the combustion process, couldn’t I just bypass the turbo altogether and route my headers back into the throttle bodies?
Since I have CFI, I could balance the DEI (direct exhaust injection as I just coined it) by feeding one header into each throttle body. Yes, the charge air wouldn’t be that cold, but it would be under a hell of a lot more pressure.
I attached a quick sketch below:
There are still a few things I need to work out:
1) How do I get the CFI aircleaner to fit in a way that hides this plumbing?
2) Does anyone make a V-band clamp that will bolt an exhaust header to a CFI throttle body?
3) What pinion angle should I use in my rear-end? I’m sure there will be a noticeable difference in torque output.
What do you guys think?
Well he’s right about the difference in torque output.
NOS “Fuel Additive”
This classic !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! goes from bad to oh-so-much worse the further into the thread you get.
My bike was running like crap on my way home from work so I stopped at a gas station to get some NOS. I poured in 2 bottles and rode it home. Well I don’t think it helped because it ran even worse on the way home and now it won’t start. Any ideas?
The real punchline is on !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Make sure to click through for maximum lulz.
Port & Polish
My new favorite !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! circa ‘07.
Hey guys, I’ve got a 98 1.8T. I’ve had a k04 and chip for a while and wanted to get more performance. I was recommended to port and polish the intake and exhaust. We found out they used abrasive material to do it like gritty sand. So I got with my friend that tunes Hondas and we decided to try it ourselves. We got a bag of sandblasting sand and hooked up into the intake and started the car. We had to hold the gas so it would run. He wanted to let the engine suck in the sand through the intake so it would port it out and then push it out the ehxaust so it would port the
!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!
.
I was worried that it might cause problems but he figured it’d be OK as long as we didn’t make boost and it get sucked in the turbo. After running the car and letting it suck in sand we got about half way through a 25 lb bag. The check engine light was on and the engine was bucking and kicking and sounding really weird. We stopped and hooked the car back up normal and took off the sand supply. We tried to start it again and it was really hard. Once started it couldn’t idle and kept making weird noises. We took it out and drove it and it started to make scraping and knocking noises.
Help! Can anyone tell me what to do! My buddy only does Hondas so he doesn’t know much about Audis.
But it always works on Hondas!
Here’s a few more:
!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! - Suggested by !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!
!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! - Suggested by !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!
That might be enough stupid for one day, but I’m a glutton for schadenfreude so please share any epic auto forum fails you’ve encountered over the years.
ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
> Baeromez
08/10/2015 at 23:00 |
|
These all smell of trolls, funny as they are.
Ad Arizona Parking Solutions to your list. It was covered on Jalopnik, and is utterly hysterical.
|
Baeromez
> ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
08/10/2015 at 23:13 |
|
Wow, had to look that one up .
WhiskeyGolf
> Baeromez
08/10/2015 at 23:16 |
|
These are all so, so classic. I like the guy who welded his diff, like the actual gears inside.
Urambo Tauro
> Baeromez
08/10/2015 at 23:31 |
|
If you’ve never visited KaleCoAuto.com , you’re missing out.
KaleCoAuto is your one-stop shop for items like blinker fluid, adjustable power bands, and cross-drilled brake lines. I’ve never tried to place an order, but considering that
a fool and his money are soon parted
, I can’t help but think there’s money to be made...
I mean c’mon, if someone’s willing to pay good money for a left handed metric screwdriver, then hey I’ll sell you mine!
|
Baeromez
> Urambo Tauro
08/10/2015 at 23:37 |
|
Oh I’m very familiar with KaleCoAuto. It’s where I always buy my muffler bearings.
|
Baeromez
> WhiskeyGolf
08/10/2015 at 23:39 |
|
This guy?
Dunnik
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 02:00 |
|
|
Dunnik
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 02:02 |
|
|
Baeromez
> Dunnik
08/11/2015 at 02:11 |
|
There aren’t enough facepalms in the whole galactic quadrant to express all my “wat?”s.
Tohru
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 03:16 |
|
I know a guy who used to go by the online name “hakuna miata”.
Among his ideas were an engine with square pistons, a Direct Exhaust Injection 6-cycle engine, a “chain-driven ratcheting turbo”, and the “Hakuna 8”, a V6 with two extra cylinders in the intake valley.
Years later, I’m still getting revelations:
|
Baeromez
> Tohru
08/11/2015 at 03:19 |
|
|
Baeromez
> Tohru
08/11/2015 at 03:30 |
|
We need more of this guy. For historical purposes. Like Rasputin.
pip bip - choose Corrour
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 06:40 |
|
Audi v APS is hilarious!
SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 07:48 |
|
I’ve got a 98 1.8T
Well there’s your problem!
|
SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
> Urambo Tauro
08/11/2015 at 07:49 |
|
Do you not have an adjustable power band? You just wave to wait for VTEC to kick in, brah.
|
SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
> Tohru
08/11/2015 at 07:50 |
|
I’m not sure that this guy understands what a square engine is.
B/Xmrrmvr
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 07:58 |
|
The first one sort of sounds like EGR.
450X_FTW
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 08:35 |
|
!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!
Congrats you just designed an EGR system......
nermal
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 08:48 |
|
Shervin and his ZX10R!
The finished product, with holes cut in the frame for lightening (!) and custom exhaust made of sheet metal (!).
|
WhiskeyGolf
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 09:00 |
|
That would be the one!
Snuze: Needs another Swede
> Tohru
08/11/2015 at 10:56 |
|
The weird thing is, he’s kind of on to some ideas that do exist, and work, though I don’t think it’s quite what he thinks.
Honda did oval pistons (with 2 con-rods per piston) on the NR 750. Square pistons could work, but rings would be a bitch, probably even worse than rotary apex seals. There’s so many reasons round pistons are better, but it’s not completely inconceivable. It’s a case of “just because you can build something, doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.”
6 cycle engines exist, though obviously not with direct exhaust injection. But there’s one “6 cycle” that is essentially a small 2 stroke engine on top of a 4 stroke. The 6 stroke controls the valves, and provides extra compression and exhaust scavenging power. There’s also an experimental 6 stroke that uses steam. It’s got the normal 4 strokes, then after exhaust they spray the cylinder down with hot water - the waste heat in the cylinder turns the water to steam and it has a 2 stroke steam cycle. It works, and proved to be slightly more efficient than a normal 4 stroke in terms of power density, but had major issues with cylinder wall wash-down - the steam would clean the oil off and it would eat through piston rings faster than a square piston.
The chain drive ratcheting turbo - not sure why he picked a chain, but I believe Banks developed a compound turbo/supercharger. It’s basically a turbo, but with a pulley mounted around the center bearing cartridge on an over-run clutch. A belt off the engine drives it at first, like a centrifugal supercharger, then as the turbine comes up to speed it over-runs the belt drive. I’m not sure how well it worked, but it was a thing.
The Hakuna V8 sounds... ok, that may not work. I mean, I think I kinda see what hes going for - There’s the VW VR and W engines, and Honda did some V3 and V5 motorcycle engines. So kind of like that, but not. I think it could physically be built, I just have no idea how it would be balanced.
aquila121
> ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
08/11/2015 at 11:57 |
|
Man, you beat me to suggesting this one.
BannedAndFurious
> Tohru
08/11/2015 at 12:15 |
|
I remember that guy from my 4chan /o/ days. He was a pretty chill troll, for that insane place. May or may not have something to do with WAT Racing development.
|
Tohru
> BannedAndFurious
08/11/2015 at 12:40 |
|
I don’t know if hakuna miata is part of WAT Racing, but I know someone who is.
Opponaut “Dick Saplenti, MD”. Check his quarter window.
Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 13:27 |
|
I’m too busy to read this; I need to go and pack my muffler bearings.
|
BannedAndFurious
> Tohru
08/11/2015 at 13:29 |
|
It has been several years since is was on /o/, those were the “terminator/black snake blown” days.
Here is my sticker. It got me in a fair share of trouble at the dealership, mechanic claimed I had tuned engine even though all I had was a silly sticker (and way too much boost for the stock turbo)
Hot Takes Salesman
> ADabOfOppo; Gone Plaid (Instructables Can Be Confusable)
08/11/2015 at 15:04 |
|
Could you link to the Jalopnik article or has it been taken down, I can't find it.
|
Hot Takes Salesman
> Urambo Tauro
08/11/2015 at 15:09 |
|
This is fantastic. I wanna see a Torchinsky article about this site, holy shit
|
Baeromez
> nermal
08/11/2015 at 16:01 |
|
Hmm, do you have any links to any build threads or anything?
|
nermal
> Baeromez
08/11/2015 at 16:58 |
|
The one I linked above is a good one, this should be all of his threads:
verdon
> nermal
04/01/2018 at 23:21 |
|
Looks pretty cool project.